04-17-2013, 07:03 AM
I really like the flow and almost self-discussion in it, I think it works really well.
I'm not sure on 'big fat' as a description though, it's a bit child-like in its ways. I like the line breaks apart from on 'somebody/they love/or to break..', as I wouldn't end it on somebody - eg, put line 2 back into line 1.
I'm not sure on 'big fat' as a description though, it's a bit child-like in its ways. I like the line breaks apart from on 'somebody/they love/or to break..', as I wouldn't end it on somebody - eg, put line 2 back into line 1.
- Amy
(You wouldn't be surprised to know my parents did not christen me UnicornRainbowCake.)
(You wouldn't be surprised to know my parents did not christen me UnicornRainbowCake.)