I first saw him eight years ago

[NakedBear]

Mr dashboard’s green glowing clock,
or the swaying red light in dusk;
but I will not again look at i think this is now the problem line.
that man blearing back at me from the Co-op’s shadow,
who shakes every night down this street. not sure this lines needed because of shakes in the next line.
a suggestion ;
I look at anything but
that man blearing back at me from the Co-op’s shadow,

after the 2nd line

I like the second 'shake' for the repeated sound, yet differing meanings.

That problem line. Hmm.

---

Oh, maybe this is a solution? (I changed the title)

I’ll look

at my dashboard’s green glowing clock,
or the swaying red light in dusk,
but not that man blearing back at me from the Co-op’s shadow,
who shakes every night down this street.