Porch Lights

[justcloudy]

hi Lewis, I really enjoyed reading your portrait of morning's arrival. you have some really stark and strong images in here, and felt really easy to relate to the poem, so well done--that's huge.

as far as the writing I thought this bit was the weakest:
"When tuning in with the present
isn't worth a dime
and reflection is a distant impossibility "
(I don't like giving suggestions as to how to change it because this is not my poem, and I'm sure you can repackage those ideas yourself.)

I'm not sure if the ending works for me. I think I'd rather have the questions left unanswered, and just something more subtle maybe... just feel it could be stronger at the end.

anyway this was a really lovely piece of nostalgia for things not yet gone... thanks for sharing.