03-30-2013, 03:38 PM
@ news who wrote: I just cannot let (her) go (away). borderline cliche
yes, that is correct but my poem needs this phrase. And yes: it is cliché in real life too.
"The spread out wide arms of Jesus not being
nailed to the wood of the cross but
there is no cross:
Just a man
inviting us all with a gesture
that does not need words to tell.this is funny to me"
What I want here is a painting, a depiction of that kind of Northen African Jesus, who is not a pesach lamb slaughtered, but cannot find one online. I cannot but wish I could show instead of tell.
If this stanza made you smile that is ok with me too. It was just not intended to be. ;-)
For the time being (the bitch she is) I will simply and elegantly pass over this stanza.
yes, that is correct but my poem needs this phrase. And yes: it is cliché in real life too.
"The spread out wide arms of Jesus not being
nailed to the wood of the cross but
there is no cross:
Just a man
inviting us all with a gesture
that does not need words to tell.this is funny to me"
What I want here is a painting, a depiction of that kind of Northen African Jesus, who is not a pesach lamb slaughtered, but cannot find one online. I cannot but wish I could show instead of tell.
If this stanza made you smile that is ok with me too. It was just not intended to be. ;-)
For the time being (the bitch she is) I will simply and elegantly pass over this stanza.