Split me open

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Split me open

neena2504 Offline

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member

Posts: 62
Threads: 6
Joined: Mar 2013

#14

03-28-2013, 12:37 AM

Hi,

I really liked it. It is very effective and the emotion is very daring and true to its core. This is just my opinion, I feel the last 2 lines are not flowing fluidly with the rest of the poem, if they are written keeping the meter in mind then this will become a great poem Smile

Smile

~Neena

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Messages In This Thread

Split me open - by Tommy - 03-09-2013, 10:45 AM

RE: Split me open - by Aphroditeny - 03-09-2013, 11:02 AM

RE: Split me open - by newsclippings - 03-09-2013, 12:16 PM

RE: Split me open - by billy - 03-09-2013, 05:50 PM

RE: Split me open - by Tommy - 03-10-2013, 06:19 AM

RE: Split me open - by serge gurkski - 03-28-2013, 01:51 AM

RE: Split me open - by Michelle311 - 03-10-2013, 08:05 PM

RE: Split me open - by Jamie - 03-10-2013, 10:20 PM

RE: Split me open - by cidermaid - 03-10-2013, 10:31 PM

RE: Split me open - by serge gurkski - 03-11-2013, 12:50 AM

RE: Split me open - by Tommy - 03-11-2013, 06:03 AM

RE: Split me open - by serge gurkski - 03-11-2013, 03:01 PM

RE: Split me open - by escorial - 03-11-2013, 07:25 AM

RE: Split me open - by Tommy - 03-27-2013, 03:22 PM

RE: Split me open - by neena2504 - 03-28-2013, 12:37 AM

RE: Split me open - by saeity - 03-28-2013, 04:22 AM

RE: Split me open - by serge gurkski - 03-28-2013, 04:25 AM

RE: Split me open - by Tommy - 03-28-2013, 09:44 AM

RE: Split me open - by saeity - 03-28-2013, 09:53 AM

RE: Split me open - by serge gurkski - 03-28-2013, 10:15 AM

RE: Split me open - by trueenigma - 03-31-2013, 04:31 PM

RE: Split me open - by serge gurkski - 03-31-2013, 08:17 PM

RE: Split me open - by Tommy - 04-01-2013, 06:52 AM

RE: Split me open - by serge gurkski - 04-01-2013, 01:41 PM

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