Nothing at the center
#2
Brilliant concept for a poem, Mikey.

For the sake of rhythm, would you consider "swear another oath" instead of "swear a new oath"?

Also, maybe dashes around -- sometimes -- as an aside rather than commas.

But such little things, because I really like this idea and the way you've delivered it.
It could be worse
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Messages In This Thread
Nothing at the center - by NakedBear - 03-22-2013, 03:40 PM
RE: Nothing at the center - by Leanne - 03-22-2013, 03:54 PM
RE: Nothing at the center - by NakedBear - 03-22-2013, 04:27 PM
RE: Nothing at the center - by Leanne - 03-22-2013, 04:28 PM
RE: Nothing at the center - by NakedBear - 03-22-2013, 05:02 PM
RE: Nothing at the center - by NakedBear - 03-23-2013, 03:48 PM
RE: Nothing at the center - by PeaceGirl Wilkins - 03-25-2013, 08:19 AM
RE: Nothing at the center - by NakedBear - 03-25-2013, 01:58 PM



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