03-19-2013, 11:43 PM
I've added a revision, see what you think. couldn't seem to make it work without "morale" so I changed it a bit. also, I'm terrible with titles.
Todd I was thinking... maybe one of the reasons you like this one is because as I wrote it I had my past critiques in mind... hopefully that indicates improvement. ;D
also, softlyfalling thanks again for your thoughts, it was interesting to read your take on the poem... much of what you suggested (wallpaper, TV...) wasn't really at all what I had in mind as I wrote it, and that's wonderful. a good poem lets us see ourselves in it, so it's encouraging that maybe I've done that here. =]
Todd I was thinking... maybe one of the reasons you like this one is because as I wrote it I had my past critiques in mind... hopefully that indicates improvement. ;D
also, softlyfalling thanks again for your thoughts, it was interesting to read your take on the poem... much of what you suggested (wallpaper, TV...) wasn't really at all what I had in mind as I wrote it, and that's wonderful. a good poem lets us see ourselves in it, so it's encouraging that maybe I've done that here. =]
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The howling beast is back.
The howling beast is back.