A First

[NakedBear]

There's enough here to interest me in the subject.

Every time you see me it's like you woke to a bad dream
I don't apologize but I'm sorry that I'm not that thing
You needed or expected
But like a four foot fat kid on the basketball team I still feel rejected

presumably the speaker knows a bit about why he's unwanted. It would be helpful to me if some of those reasons are put forward. Maybe they can be put forward, then the speaker can rebut them

The average mans pain and strife
The soul being cut by the blunt edge of a rusty kitchen knife
But don't get it confused because I do love my life
Cause you helped bring it light
That pierced through the carmel brown darkness brought on by a man named Jameson who visited every night
But you know what...fuck you...I deserve better and I know I'm right
Haha...look at me writing poetry..this must be a fucking sight.

Who's that Jameson guy and why does he bring carmel brown darkness?

You mention rusty knives, but don't tell what those knives are. Use a metaphor or simile.

and then your turn with "fuck you..." and say you deserve better. Why?

Anyway, I'm interested, but you'll have to tell me more before some other feeling takes shape in addition to that interest.

Mikey