03-10-2013, 05:08 AM
(03-09-2013, 07:56 PM)tectak Wrote: I'm going in deep.I like it a lot, even if, or because of, the sad fact that you stole my entre-parenthèses-trick. Whatever! Whatsoever is mine shall be your's!
(Love me, babe, love me like you know me.)
I'm going in slow.
(Hurt me, babe, in this dark I am your pain.)
I'm going in hard.
(Feel me, babe, for just this time, you own me)
I'm going in fast.
(Fuck me, babe, ride against the chain)
I'm going in fast.
( Kill me, babe, take me to the sky) <--- love this line best. ,-)
I'm going in fast.
( Love me, babe, love me like you care)
l'm coming, you're mine.
(Love me, babe, love me 'til I cry)
I'm coming, I'M THERE!
(Love me...love me...love me...love me...love me...LOVE ME)
I'm going.
tectak
2013
I just don't know why you post this little cutie here, with you not seriously expecting serious critiquing because there are not nits detectable, as you know yourself quite well. (You are quite well aware of your pornograffiting skills.)
When I just wrote: no nits to be detected, I of course meant: undetectable on the surface. Below the surface, though, linger demonic forces riding you, I could undisclose to an openmouthed public (salivating over the prospect of my washing your dirty laundry here). But fuck all those voyeurs, because Leanne on another thread correctly remarked with appreciable arrogance that it's not the poet's job to explain their texts to the readership, and by that same token let me state that it is not the critic's business to explain anyone else's intentions to other anyone elses (unless of course getting paid for this cumbersome work).
Having puked out this
Fare thee well!
maddog serge