Fading

[there's-a-war-in-my-mind]

dark was i
and the thoughts in my head.
consumed by remorse
i toyed with death

forgotten felt i
and the things i had said.
i lay down with the leaves
throat on fire, eyes red

unwanted was i,
out of place everywhere.
if i disappeared now
the sky would not care

impermeable i had
began to become,
a lion-hearted girl
insults conjured like venom

imposing was i
on the happiness there.
wasted, wide-eyed,
"love me", i dared

lost i felt
in the depths of your bed.
my mind turned to God
"he loves you", they said

unhappy was i
and the thoughts in my head,
so i leapt from the spire
to run with the dead