01-29-2013, 10:58 PM
(01-26-2013, 04:05 AM)Stanton Wrote: Hey guys,All in all, it's a nice poem, especially for a first
this is my first English poemThanks for some feedback!!!
Story of Life
Heaven´s utmost creation, utmost doesn't fit too well
The most sensitive sensation,
The hardest to wield, the hardest it is to wield my own feelings concealed would be better (in my opinion)
One´s feelings concealed.
Off to find heaven´s chest,
No longer able to be self-possessed,
Human kind´s inherent quest,
No time to rest.
maybe it's just me but I can't make sense of this stanza too well
Fleeting, boundless, never-ending,
Thus, two people depending.


Thanks for some feedback!!!