There is no bright light to travel toward (revision)

[Leanne]

The stories you’ve been told are wrong; -- I want this to be a colon for emphasis, but you know me and punctuation
this is no mild passage -- could also be soft passage, which is the more common term and might highlight the refutation of the "stories"

to golden streets. There is no comfort- -- love the strong enjambment

ing metaphor for this state.

The breath escapes, -- could also be a full stop here instead
the body shudders, exhales.

Life unzips like an old coat,
discarded.

Memories drown in the river -- do you need "in the river"? You could achieve a similar image by putting "well-worn river stones" in the next line
facts alone remain, well-worn stones

without significance. This is lost to us,
a Lethean draught, irremediable


concealing loves, cares that bind, tying -- nice inversion of the more cliched phrasing
us to this world, that we may not leave


this woman at my bedside, my wife, -- you could remove "my wife" from here, and...
presses a damp cloth to my face.

She has become -- start this line with it: "my wife has become"
an actress in an old movie


that I might have watched once.

These recollections form an endless list

of mocking credits rolling
NamesUponNamesUponNames
 -- excellent

in this oppressive quiet
ForeverForeverForever. -- and a haunting finish

You can see from my suggestions that I can only think of minor stylistic changes, because the substance is already very strong. The things I've mentioned are preference only. This is excellent stuff.