01-09-2013, 08:26 AM
Hey Billy,
Aww shucks, it was a hilarious and solid read.
My 2 nits are a comma after "They'd blow their pointy poison darts" and "the tiny buggers never hit"
I like the transition from running from being dinner to being a dessert
"She drizzled jam upon my ham/it stood proud, it wasn't picky" very good innuendo, which made it that much more funny.
This had adventure, escaping from stew and a happy ending all in one, who could ask for more? Entertaining read, but also clever.
Aww shucks, it was a hilarious and solid read.
My 2 nits are a comma after "They'd blow their pointy poison darts" and "the tiny buggers never hit"
I like the transition from running from being dinner to being a dessert
"She drizzled jam upon my ham/it stood proud, it wasn't picky" very good innuendo, which made it that much more funny.
This had adventure, escaping from stew and a happy ending all in one, who could ask for more? Entertaining read, but also clever.