12-22-2012, 07:08 PM
It's been said so many times even my critique is a cliche... love has been felt and described a billion times so writers of 'love poems' really do have to find unique - truly unique ways/forms/metaphors/narratives etc. What this piece offers is earnestness; ardent and pushy! There is a poem in there but to find it I think your enthusiasm will need restraining and your writing head screwed on real tight so that none of your passion leaks out but is guided toward constructing the poem carefully.