My first poem since I was a teenager.

[billy]

i'm with ash on the title. the title like the front door to a poem and sometimes the back door as well.
many of my fist poems and some of the ones i do now. tell a story. what we need to do is embellish the story with pictures/images. wherever possible don't use intangible words like despair, hope, dread, horror and doubt. instead describe the feeling you have when they happen,

And all I can explain is this:
I have felt despair.

the question begged here is; what have you explained

how about (and this is just a suggestion for you to think about)

And all I can explain is this:
The devil's tongue has stripped from my flesh
the skin of expectancy

think of a picture in your mind and say what that picture is.

thanks for the read. and for fighting through the embarrassment, the more we do it, the easier it gets