Blobfish

[Todd]

Near the surface I see dolphins grinning
Playing, swimming, jumping, spinning
They are beautiful, successful, full of joy
Winning over hearts easily and never coy

And then there is me, pretty as a blobfish can be
Mouth open, lurking in the deep, dark sea
I am content, but I wish I for once could see
A smiling face when somebody looked at me

I like this which is to say that I don't like it. Huh? I like what you've done, but the content makes me sad. I think most people can relate with this. I think what you've done with grinning through the end of line 2 captures the frenetic joy we associate with dolphins. The one line that gives me issues is line seven the two I's feel a bit off and might be there only to accommodate your syllable count. I also don't buy the speaker's I am content. I am resigned possibly, content: no. Otherwise we wouldn't have the final line. The best part of the poem for me though is the phrase near the surface in line one and the blobfish being in the deep. It's like crying out and saying look a little deeper. It's a subtle thing, and I quite like it.

Best,

Todd