Behind a Different Door:

[Todd]

Billy, at first I read this and thought Billy's just playing around. Very quickly, I saw that wasn't the case. The voice was excellent, very believable.

Mummy scares me...
She drinks lots of water;--great detail hangover avoidance
after she stops falling over
it's time for cigarettes

"Milly" she calls

I'm frightened of hearing.
My name gives me dreams--this was all good but I especially liked this line break and the next two lines
of blooded broom handles
and the smell of poo

I'm invisible sometimes
but sometimes not--this is the type of line that makes the voice real for me
when she sees me through the wood
and points a finger that says

"I know where you are"--like an angry god

I wee myself and start shaking

She can see me now
she's holding the broom...

---

--maybe more subtle with a different sense. "I hear her sweeping in front of the door" that's not perfect but I'm thinking just have her using the broom. It will come across. Just a thought. How you have it still works

originated from this thread.

Good write Billy.