11-20-2012, 11:20 AM
hello mayflow!
some thoughts for you
some thoughts for you
(11-18-2012, 11:13 PM)Mayflow Wrote: A moth drawn to a flame dies,I like the daring nature of this, though I felt like some goals were more attainable than others. It was a fun read for me. thanks for posting
but as I've heard from the likes of Rumi
and such other poets ...this line did little for me; almost seems to try and steal attention
it dies in ecstasy!
Why? It is drawn by the Light
It is consumed by the Light;
It becomes the Light...i like the conciseness and repetition of the ideas here; perhaps cutting some words could make it even neater (the "why", the "it is"'s)
A poet writing a poem is consumed by the poem
Differentials are consumed...already used "consumed" many times
and oneness assimilated
Therefore I suggest evidence that Rumi
and moths are the one and the same. ...i like the idea more than the execution...you are making a pretty big leap, and i don't know if everything that has come before this point gives you enough support
Of course He was a very poetic moth,
but aren't they all?
Written only for you to consider.

