The Battle Of Love

[Philatone]

hello mreds!

...if you think it's an eyesore, then why leave it like that? I think some good ole' formatting and trimming will help the aesthetics; as is, you have a pretty jagged block that could use some stanzas for organization

A love that was never meant to be,
Flourished into a love that shall never cease,
Such as that of the moon and sea, "such as that of the" feels a bit clunky to me in terms of the flow
Found in a dark place,
Only to take my darkness away,..."dark" right below "darkness" feel too close together for my preference
I never expected to fall - only to be caught,
Never expected to be lost - only to be found,...i get the intention, but it still hits me as being too contradictory and clever
It's as if I'm living in a dream,
I never want to be awoken,
Life is now so surreal and so serene,...ok, but how?
A love where my heart feels comfort for once,
It makes my heart dance and sing,
Even when thereare heart aches and trouble,
This love gives me strength for the future and hope in life,
I pray to what I do not know nor understand in fear of losing this love,
Whether this be of human devices or God above,
The one thing I do know,
My problems I will overcome,
Love cannot be seen nor heard but can be felt deep in the soul,
A feeling so soothing my worries no longer beat my morale down,
No matter life's issues this love will carry me from sunset to sunset,
From breath to breath,
From life to death,
I rejoice in knowing I have the greatest love of all,
I'll never let this true love burn out like the flame of a candle,...the idea, while understandable, is not entirely fresh. can you find a new, more innovative way to express this?
It's an eternal flame that keeps my heart warm,
Let this love last forever,
Or from my chest let my heart be torn,
I vow to protect this love with my life,
After all my life it's become,
I shall never find such a treasure again,
So if it shall end,
My desire shall too,
My heart will again be in despair,
A feeling I never again wish to feel,
This treasure of mine will continue to be guarded day and night,
After all a fight for love is the greatest of all fights,...i'm not convinced, but i want to be. can you show me how?
So i shall be deemed a protector,
A guardian of love,
A warrior of passion,
Let thy enemies come,
So shall too the sounds of swords and shields clashing,
Battle after battle is won on the battlefield of love,
Conqueror of heart and soul is love,
So let the war rage on,
A war with no end,
I've vowed my life to this cause - so I pray,
Let me die on the battlefield as a defender,
I shall die happy,
A worthy death it will be,
After all - Life without this love is not worth living,
So death to this love is worth giving

for now, this strikes me as getting a bit bogged down in some of its ideas; there are many. i think trimming this down (for instance, "love" appears many many times here)and finding some kind of organization for it would make the piece have a better sense of direction and, ultimately, a goal.