Diagnostic Terms (revision)

[Wildcard]

A life weighs more than bones and skin,
and two years is not enough time
to say goodbye.

Oh Jesus, that is heavy This is so thoughtful and poignant, especially the close.

He went to the doctor to get worse.

Each line I read is like a nail driving into my heart.

weak legs
with metal braces, and weak lungs
with ventilators

It is odd when I think about how I wouldn't write that repetition into my own work, but yet in this piece it isn't a weakness, but a strength. Nicely done.

I kept waiting for the table to rise to the ceiling
and for him to ride the lightning back to life.

I keep feeling like you have set the scene up good enough that the last bit is unnecessary jmo

Cardiomyopathy meant that even the heart
is a muscle that doesn't care
how determined you are.

I like the sound of it, but I don't exactly connect with it . . . why do the other muscles care how determined you are again?

A life weighs more than bones and skin,
and two years is not enough time
to say goodbye.

Back to this . . . wow what a nice job. Will definitely be back a few times on this one.

Thanks for sharing.