The card

[Todd]

Hi Lynda,

Welcome to the forum! Here are some comments below for you:

Hi, I'm new to this forum but very curious what you think of my poem.
Tell me what I can improve!

"The card that I was never given.
And never did I read,-- I would suggest keeping the conversational tone without inverting the syntax. Maybe cut did I
beloved words on cardboard paper written.--same thing written before on.
Merely an empty shelf instead

A gesture that was never sent to my address.
And never did my fingertips caress--my fingerprints before never
plasticized paper that shows an amusing "get well soon" — cartoon.

The way that people can express
that on recovery they truly wish you all the loving success.--I would consider cutting these lines and stay firmly with the conceit of the poem

And though I never was sent,
a silly stupid present.

I wrote me a letter, to make me feel better.--I would be in favor of this line being I wrote this letter
Those beloved words written to myself,--you could cut those
to finally fill my empty shelf."

I like this. It's a good idea. It's executed well. I think the trick to pulling it off is pared it down and tightening it where you can and cleaning up the syntax. This one is all about pacing. It needs to be conversational and fast.

I hope some of that was helpful, ignore what wasn't.

Best,

Todd