Tragic Villains

[Indie]

A slowly turning face in a dark room, A face turns slowly in a dark room
like some terrible flower opening, I understand what you mean, but IMO there must be a stronger more evocative work than terrible. Maybe carnivorous, like those venus fly traps though I don't know if that is the imagery you had in mind.
reveals the extent of a man's disfigurement. revealing the extent of the (possessive in context, in replacement of "a") man's disfigurement

My favourite villains are always fucked up
by one of chance's games,
emerging from the wake of pain
with faces gouged. I can't love a madman move the new sentence to the next line?
unless he's been hurt.

The road to evil is paved not with good intentions
but a writer's contrivances; the soul of God
looking down and divining a crash.
A man's heart can be malleable,
changed beyond recognition by random hands.

And when like a flower he unfolds himself anew
you will see just dementia and pain. IMO in this context dementia doesn't work in the way I think you want it to

Hey Jack, I like the idea of this of this one, but I think it could be a lot stronger in imagery and message.