09-28-2012, 12:18 AM
If you used 'despite' instead of 'in spite' you could eliminate the 'of' and the spiteful connotation hanging at the edge of the one line.
Lover of the arts despite
the moon's symbolic rise.
The speaker is "just saying" in my view. It's a speaker that exists in the saying. A general voice addressing a subject in and of itself. But this voice has no authority; we can't trust it somehow. And I'll tell you why: It doesn't have the depth and scope, as it is, to handle the intangible subject matter. The voice is too limited to feel like an authoritative guide through the complex nature of dreams. There is no individual personality speaking, so the voice should be more advanced. "A god without the pews" limits the scope of the voice too much. Try to go beyond yourself and create this voice as if it were talking to you as something strange to you. That can open it more to the experience it's extolling.
Lover of the arts despite
the moon's symbolic rise.
The speaker is "just saying" in my view. It's a speaker that exists in the saying. A general voice addressing a subject in and of itself. But this voice has no authority; we can't trust it somehow. And I'll tell you why: It doesn't have the depth and scope, as it is, to handle the intangible subject matter. The voice is too limited to feel like an authoritative guide through the complex nature of dreams. There is no individual personality speaking, so the voice should be more advanced. "A god without the pews" limits the scope of the voice too much. Try to go beyond yourself and create this voice as if it were talking to you as something strange to you. That can open it more to the experience it's extolling.