07-27-2012, 02:47 AM
Thx for your critique....
I will try to be less intangible next time
the second stanza i just meant to say that
The birds fly with the freedom of love and hate the birds don't love or hate anybody, they are free of such feelings
Careless of their ends and melancholy fate nor do they care when they will die or how, they don't understand the concept of hate
Breaking these torment chains and step in the blissful shoes the narrator, who is in exile, any sort mental, physical, emotion what so ever wants to break the barriers that are holding him down in pain
We will grown exuberant wings like them too he wishes for the wings he believes that these wings give him the power to be like birds
I will try to be less intangible next time
the second stanza i just meant to say that
The birds fly with the freedom of love and hate the birds don't love or hate anybody, they are free of such feelings
Careless of their ends and melancholy fate nor do they care when they will die or how, they don't understand the concept of hate
Breaking these torment chains and step in the blissful shoes the narrator, who is in exile, any sort mental, physical, emotion what so ever wants to break the barriers that are holding him down in pain
We will grown exuberant wings like them too he wishes for the wings he believes that these wings give him the power to be like birds