< this is literature for chrissake >

[rayheinrich]

so wipe that smile off your face
and get serious

literature is life
and life is serious
and i'm serious

and you must be serious
since you've emailed me three times about my damned poem

i'm hoping this reply will get you off my back

so you asked me:
"what's the dwarf mean?"

jeeeesus, i'm not a mind reader,
i have no idea what that dwarf means to you!

but i can at least tell you
what some of the other elements of the poem mean to me:

bunny-rabbit is jesus
big-bear is truth
randy-the-sex-starved-goat is just there to attract readers such as yourself
and fred-the-farmer stands for the selfishness
that keeps most of us from leaving
the cycle of rebirth at moo-cow's farm

and winky-the-dwarf?

he's all yours

- - -

[Leanne]

Thank you, I've always wanted a dwarf, now I've something to stand my flowers in.

On a slightly more serious note (as if there's anything in the world more serious than where to stick your wilting stalks), if we follow the premise (as Barthes would have it) that once we've written it we're giving it to the reader to own, it's bloody rude of us to try and take it back. Indian givers have no place writing poetry.

[rayheinrich]

And besides, trying to take it back is about as easy as taking back that
xerox of your butt you made. (Nice tat BTW.)

[grannyjill]

I loved this poem! (I know it clearly states somewhere in the rules that it is forbidden to say such things BUT)
I am simply providing you with positive feedback which no doubt will be useful to you in your poetry-writing career.

.....it goes without saying that Winky-the-dwarf represents the down-trodden and oppressed of this world.

[rayheinrich]

.
grannyjill: "I loved this poem! (I know it clearly states somewhere in the
rules that it is forbidden to say such things BUT)"

I asked Leanne, she says that the rules permit such things as long as
the ratio of sober criticism to fawning is 5 or greater. (She checked yours
and it was 5.2 so: you're on shaky ground but if you come down hard
on billy and Mark you should be able to get it back up to a respectable
number.) Then she said "Oh, it's Ray! That's never a problem as Ray is
exempt so it's OK to fawn over him as much as you like." So, that's
what she said, gods' honest truths.


grannyjill again: "I am simply providing you with positive feedback which no doubt will be useful
to you in your poetry-writing career.

This is so true! I'm looking forward to all future positive feedbacks from
you. My self-esteem is expanding as I type. (That IS my self-esteem,
isn't it?)


The ever-lovely and most gracious grannyjill spake thus: ".....it goes without saying
that Winky-the-dwarf represents the down-trodden and oppressed of this world."

You are completely correct, let me compliment you on your selection!
(Any resemblance between Winky-the-dwarf and my expanding self-esteem
is but a vicious thought promulgated by the forces of doubleplusungood.

[Leanne]

It is perfectly true, I did say that, though Ray has oversimplified the ratio thing -- it's a sliding scale, greatly dependent on how blue the sky is on any given day from a secret vantage point in Antarctica and how reliable the reports are. Penguins are difficult to train as meteorologists, even at this most basic level.

No, it's not your self-esteem, it's a boil.

[Erthona]

I'll agree with Barthes on one thing, "Some certainly give it to the readers!

Now where did I place my wilting stalks. Damn, did I leave them in the car again. Hope I didn't shut the door.

I like to write in allegory
and make people think that it's a story.

Oh fer Christsake Leanne, just say "HARP"

Boil, boil, toil and trouble,
your self-esteem's so large,
that you're going to double.

[rayheinrich]

Well damn! I'm off to see the priest:

"When someone has a boil on his skin and it heals, and in the place where
the boil was, a white swelling or reddish-white spot appears, he must
present himself to the priest. The priest is to examine it, and if it appears
to be more than skin deep and the hair in it has turned white, the priest
shall pronounce him unclean. It is an infectious skin disease that has
broken out where the boil was. But if, when the priest examines it, there
is no white hair in it and it is not more than skin deep and has faded,
then the priest is to put him in isolation for seven days. If it is spreading
in the skin, the priest shall pronounce him unclean; it is infectious. But if
the spot is unchanged and has not spread, it is only a scar from the boil,
and the priest shall pronounce him clean." - Leviticus 13:18-23

[Leanne]

My granny always recommended a poultice of turnip leaves and whisky -- but then, our priest was a drunk so maybe he wasn't allowed near the poultices.

[rayheinrich]

Whiskey? You'd waste whiskey? Say, what kind of a cane toad are you?

P.S. My sister always recommended dicloxacillin, but she's a real pill-head.

[Leanne]

I wouldn't, it's far too precious -- I reckon that's why granny's dead now.

[rayheinrich]

.
Leanne: "wouldn't, it's far too precious -- I reckon that's why granny's dead now."

Daemon Vigure!

[Leanne]

I don't know about that... but it's uisge beatha, which I always think sounds like you should immerse yourself in it

[Erthona]

uisge beatha, aye, that's a water of life you bath in...as long as you don't try and light your smoke! (wouldn't a better translation be water spirit?) I prefer single malt myself.

What the hell is "Daemon Vigure!" Is that suppose to be Daemon Vigour? Or maybe you mean you get a succubus to come and suck the boil out of you!

The best remedy (and I've seen this work several time....on TV)

To get rid of a boil you need a shaman to rub and egg on it. Then when he cracks open the egg a small dragon flies out of the egg and your boil is gone.

[billy]

i've missed so many poems .

i got back to this one via the spotlighting the hogs forum. glad i did.

ps; i am the dwarf

[ChristopherSea]

sic] Reading [sic] my [sic] way
[sic] through [sic] these!

[sic] I [sic] must [sic] confess,
[sic] this [sic] one [sic] made [sic] me

[sic] feel [sic] a [sic] bit [sic] dizzy
[sic] and [sic] sick [sic] to [sic] my [sic] tummy.

[sic] Congrats [sic] on [sic] the [sic] spotlight! [burp]...

[rayheinrich]

sic] Reading [sic] my [sic] way
[sic] through [sic] these!

[sic] I [sic] must [sic] confess,
[sic] this [sic] one [sic] made [sic] me

[sic] feel [sic] a [sic] bit [sic] dizzy
[sic] and [sic] sick [sic] to [sic] my [sic] tummy.

[sic] Congrats [sic] on [sic] the [sic] spotlight! [burp]...

The gods are angry.
'[sp]' used to do a space; and, in fact, it still does in other places
but not f'ing here so I took them out and now it's back to being
as readable as it ever was.

Ray[sic]

[ChristopherSea]

sic] Reading [sic] my [sic] way
[sic] through [sic] these!

[sic] I [sic] must [sic] confess,
[sic] this [sic] one [sic] made [sic] me

[sic] feel [sic] a [sic] bit [sic] dizzy
[sic] and [sic] sick [sic] to [sic] my [sic] tummy.

[sic] Congrats [sic] on [sic] the [sic] spotlight! [burp]...

The gods are angry.
'[sp]' used to do a space; and, in fact, it still does in other places
but not f'ing here so I took them out and now it's back to being
as readable as it ever was.

Ray[sic]

Ha, ha... Great Ray and thanks, much easier to read!/Chris

[billy]

have a lookee here

PHP Code:

or here [sp] [sp] here 


here   here

---

the sp is back

[rayheinrich]

have a lookee here

PHP Code:

or here [sp] [sp] here 


here   here

---

the sp is back

the
    gods

        are



                smiling







                                again