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Goes out my little campfire.
Hot blue-gray ash replaces dying flame
That dances on the brushwood of my days.
Inaudible the Darkness comes closer to me.
The light was measured by brushwood.
The darkness will be measured ...
It's all the same to me by now.
I read the very last line in a shabby fate scroll:
I vanish slowly into the Great Eternal Darkness.
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the metaphor for youth and declining years works really well
very poignant
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(05-06-2011, 04:24 AM)Ris Yerg Wrote: Goes out my little campfire.
Hot blue-gray ash replaces dying flame
That dances on the brushwood of my days.
Inaudible the Darkness comes closer to me.
The light was measured by brushwood.
The darkness will be measured ...
It's all the same to me by now.
I read the very last line in a shabby fate scroll:
I vanish slowly into the Great Eternal Darkness.
I'm diggin' the mood of this one Ris, very solemn from my POV and yet you manage to still hold your intensity. Capital read, thanks for that!
Sincerely,
fd
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You captured the mood of silence and a growing coldness very well in this piece. Thanks for sharing
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?
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An incredibly poignant and whole poem Ris. There's something solid and definite about it, like it knows what it wants to say and says it in the most effective way possible.
"We believe that we invent symbols. The truth is that they invent us; we are their creatures, shaped by their hard, defining edges." - Gene Wolfe
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Hi, my dear friends!
Thank you so much for such kind comments!
R.Y.
