Angelic depression.

[lizzyrose12]

.....

[billy]

It stands above a graveyard, [she stands]
Shining near a church.
It’s features plain and dull, [her features]
It’s skin breakable and cold. [her skin]

Covered in frost and leaves,
Icicle tears melting away at her eyes.
An angel pure and true.
Who stands alone and cries. [a good verse]
good verse

And at night she seems so much more alive,
To sing and dance on her own.
Away from watching souls.
With the heavens looking over her she beats her wings majestically.
A fallen angel crying out gracefully.

And the moon shines upon her face which now seems so real,
Skin is soft not hard,
Dancing in the moonlights sweet amour.
And her music lures all life into this small courtyard.
She dances under god’s eyes, of the sky of darkest black.
Waiting for one day a flock of angels to come and take her back.

The title of this poem is the same title to another poem I wrote which I was going to post originally but it was terrible so i didn't. I have a weird feeling I posted this alread but I don't think I did, I probably posted it on a different website. Thanks for reading!

you start a lot of lines with "and". for me, many of the "and's" aren't needed
you have some good lines in the poem lizzy, though it feels a little drawn out.
if you post this in mild critique or the workshop we can go over it one point at a time.
thanks for the read as always

[addy]

Great poem Lizzy. Lots of lines her that worked very well. "She dances under God's eyes" really struck me... just beautiful!

Some few problem spots, like the repetition of "and" (which from what I see aren't really necessary), but overall a solid, lovely work. Also the line:
With the heavens looking over her she beats her wings majestically.
A fallen angel crying out gracefully.
Both of them having adjectives at the end was a little distracting, but it might be just me. Doesn't really detract much from the poem.

Great job!