Posts: 695
Threads: 139
Joined: Jun 2015
The Family Tree
Even in broad daylight
while the kids call for him
by the new tire swing
granddaddy won't go near
that gnarled old southern oak.
Posts: 894
Threads: 176
Joined: Jan 2021
Hi Mark,
I guess I feel a little cheated by this poem. I want to know more about why grandaddy won't go near it. The history hint implies something ominous (e.g. a lynching), but if it's that extreme, the father's response then feels heartless. Or a family suicide, same thing.
Maybe I'm making too much out of a simple poem.
Tim
Posts: 695
Threads: 139
Joined: Jun 2015
Hey Tim-
Thanks for the comments.
The "new tire swing" helped me keep the line at 6 syallables, to match the 6 syllable count of each line: a syllabic quirk of mine that helps me stay concise. Plus, "new" seemed important to the narrative.
All that said, what I guess I was gettin at is that change can take generations.
Mark
Posts: 894
Threads: 176
Joined: Jan 2021
Thanks for the response. (Thought later: it's not thr tree's fault...)
Your six syllable rule has got me thinking...