The Humbler (Happy Ballet Times Daze)

[Erthona]

The Humbler (Happy Ballet Times Daze)

“What fools these Human’s be”
when in love, yes I see,
but, the larger truth,
what greater fools when not,
spirits twisted and souls rot!
How pompous, vain,
and condescending,
only through Love’s sufferance,
might this wound be mending,
yet hide, when see healing descending,
until by Valentine’s pox laid low,
with a shot from Eros’ bow!
Oh, oh, OH!
It is madness, is it not?
It’s been so long that I’ve forgot,
I hope it fades away…
Yet, only does the grave,
fools,
from the foolish save!
Still...not all is sadness and sorrow,
for I shall be a grave fool on the morrow,
if I might a line from Mercutio borrow,
till then, anon,
for I am gone and done,
my bugled sword in baldric hung!


erthona ©2011

[Fatman Butter]

Please realise my opinion is worth only what you have paid for it and I am no authority on poetry just an occasional reader and a dabbling writer. Now you have where I'm coming from, I need to sway there are bits of this that draw me in; but mostly they are followed by a line or two of confusion.

Yet, only does the grave,
fools,
from the foolish save!

That above...it reads so well, but I don't know what you're trying yo say. Over all this poem is a thumbs up, but I think there is improvement to be found.

[Thunderembargo]

“What fools these Human’s be”
when in love, yes I see,
but, the larger truth,
what greater fools when not,
spirits twisted and souls rot!
How pompous, vain,
and condescending,
only through Love’s sufferance,
might this wound be mending,
yet hide, when see healing descending,
until by Valentine’s pox laid low,
with a shot from Eros’ bow!
Oh, oh, OH!
It is madness, is it not?
It’s been so long that I’ve forgot,
I hope it fades away…
Yet, only does the grave,
fools,
from the foolish save!
Still...not all is sadness and sorrow,
for I shall be a grave fool on the morrow,
if I might a line from Mercutio borrow,
till then, anon,
for I am gone and done,
my bugled sword in baldric hung!


This is a solid survey, challenge and retrospect of/to Hamlet/Shakespeare. The piece could work as a diversion in some small text, an interlude in others and a postlude or comp[endium to still others. Very accomplished piece. Take heart. Your work is masterful.