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![[Image: barbados.jpg]](http://wordbiscuit.com/im5/barbados.jpg)
< the broken vase (in retrospect) was breakable >
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
Our secret Margaritaville
Our thin excuse for felony
(Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
- - -
a brightly colored fungus that grows in bark inclusions
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Threads: 1,075
Joined: Dec 2009
a broken vase by any other name.
Posts: 55
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Joined: Aug 2014
(09-26-2014, 05:28 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:
< the broken vase (in retrospect) was breakable >
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
Our secret Margaritaville.
Our thin excuse for felony
(Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Do I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
- - -
It's beautiful. I don't know if I am right but I think it speaks of a clandestine relationship. It's subtle yet effective. I liked your word choices and the first two opening lines and the last two lines add to the scenic feel. The parenthesis works well.
Posts: 444
Threads: 285
Joined: Nov 2011
(09-27-2014, 12:51 PM)Tamara Wrote: (09-26-2014, 05:28 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:
< the broken vase (in retrospect) was breakable >
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
Our secret Margaritaville.
Our thin excuse for felony
(Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
- - -
It's beautiful. I don't if I am right but I think it speaks of a clandestine relationship. It's subtle yet effective. I liked your word choices and the first two opening lines and the last two lines add to the scenic feel. The parenthesis works well.
Thank you four times.
a brightly colored fungus that grows in bark inclusions
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(09-26-2014, 05:28 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:
< the broken vase (in retrospect) was breakable >
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
Our secret Margaritaville
Our thin excuse for felony
(Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
- - -
I continue to enjoy this, especially
Quote: (Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
and the title. The softness of the B sounds work so well to express vulnerability and melancholy, a sense of fondness for a regrettable event. The distance yet unshakable closeness comes through. Thanks for posting it.
billy wrote:welcome to the site. make it your own, wear it like a well loved slipper and wear it out. ella pleads:please click forum titles for posting guidelines, important threads. New poet? Try Poetic DevicesandWard's Tips
Posts: 444
Threads: 285
Joined: Nov 2011
(11-02-2014, 10:10 PM)ellajam Wrote: I continue to enjoy this, especially
Quote: (Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
and the title. The softness of the B sounds work so well to express vulnerability and melancholy, a sense of fondness for a regrettable event. The distance yet unshakable closeness comes through. Thanks for posting it.
You made my non-turquoise (but still beautiful) day.
The immoral of this poem is: "Don't take your fickle husband to symposia in Barbados."
a brightly colored fungus that grows in bark inclusions
