< her daughter had cancer and died >

[rayheinrich]

Her daughter had cancer and died.
(And she cried and she cried and she cried.)
"It was her before me,
that's not how it should be!"
(And she cried and she cried and she cried.)

[Mopkins]

Of cancer I’ll probably die
I’m an incessant smoker, that’s why.
I can’t seem to stop,
one day I will drop;
around me will buzz all the flies....


hope that's not a true story Ray....

[Erthona]

It's a true story from somewhere, but as Milo would say they all die, some sooner than others, no big deal.

Ray, drop the "that's" in L4 if you want to smooth out that line.

Dale

[rayheinrich]

It's a true story from somewhere, but as Milo would say they all die, some sooner than others, no big deal.

Ray, drop the "that's" in L4 if you want to smooth out that line.

Dale

Her DAUGH ter had CAN cer and DIED.
(And she CRIED and she CRIED and she CRIED.)
"It was HER be fore ME,
that's not HOW it should BE!"
(And she CRIED and she CRIED and she CRIED.)

The feet are all anapests (except for the iamb at the start).
Maybe "that's" is longer (when pronounced) in your dialect?
The folks in my karass (God-fearing Bokononists all) tend
to substitute a short "e" (as in "wet") for the longer "a"
(as in "fat"). Of course, even Bokonon doesn't know how
those criminals in the ever-dyslexicle bass-ackward
down-under (he said dashedly) pronounce it.

[milo]

It's a true story from somewhere, but as Milo would say they all die, some sooner than others, no big deal.

Ray, drop the "that's" in L4 if you want to smooth out that line.

Dale

Everyone dies from something, cancer is something. There is a general consensus that a longer life is a better life but I doubt the veracity of that.

[ellajam]

It's a true story from somewhere, but as Milo would say they all die, some sooner than others, no big deal.

Ray, drop the "that's" in L4 if you want to smooth out that line.

Dale

Everyone dies from something, cancer is something. There is a general consensus that a longer life is a better life but I doubt the veracity of that.

That's what the poem's about for me, it's not mom's long life that's preferable.

[rayheinrich]

Of cancer I’ll probably die
I’m an incessant smoker, that’s why.
I can’t seem to stop,
one day I will drop;
around me will buzz all the flies....


hope that's not a true story Ray....

True for a former neighbor of mine in Virginia.
Back here in Texas, my neighbor across the street lost
her daughter to a c-section that became infected with an
antibiotic-resistant bacterium. Her granddaughter, by the
way, is just fine. Just last week I loaned her red paint
(her choice) and a brush so she could paint the rocks along
her grandma's driveway.

[milo]

It's a true story from somewhere, but as Milo would say they all die, some sooner than others, no big deal.

Ray, drop the "that's" in L4 if you want to smooth out that line.

Dale

Her DAUGH ter had CAN cer and DIED.
(And she CRIED and she CRIED and she CRIED.)
"It was HER be fore ME,
that's not HOW it should BE!"
(And she CRIED and she CRIED and she CRIED.)

The feet are all anapests (except for the iamb at the start).
Maybe "that's" is longer (when pronounced) in your dialect?
The folks in my karass (God-fearing Bokononists all) tend
to substitute a short "e" (as in "wet") for the longer "a"
(as in "fat"). Of course, even Bokonon doesn't know how
those criminals in the ever-dyslexicle bass-ackward
down-under (he said dashedly) pronounce it.

Without the predominant meter L4 would be iambi trimeter. This can be problematic.

[rayheinrich]

Everyone dies from something, cancer is something. There is a general consensus that a longer life is a better life but I doubt the veracity of that.

Same here. I think it's an average. But should it be an absolute average?
Selective memory loss (tendency to forget more bad than good) does tend
to make your life better as you get older because there is more bad to forget
and more good to remember.

The strategy to obtain the best life would be to kill yourself before the
bad parts at the end decreased your average. Just when you kill yourself
depends greatly on how predictable your future is. Terminal cancer makes
this decision comparatively easy. The decision when you're in great pain
but have a chance of recovery is quite difficult.

---

It's a true story from somewhere, but as Milo would say they all die, some sooner than others, no big deal.
Ray, drop the "that's" in L4 if you want to smooth out that line.
Dale

Her DAUGH ter had CAN cer and DIED.
(And she CRIED and she CRIED and she CRIED.)
"It was HER be fore ME,
that's not HOW it should BE!"
(And she CRIED and she CRIED and she CRIED.)

The feet are all anapests (except for the iamb at the start).
Maybe "that's" is longer (when pronounced) in your dialect?
The folks in my karass (God-fearing Bokononists all) tend
to substitute a short "e" (as in "wet") for the longer "a"
(as in "fat"). Of course, even Bokonon doesn't know how
those criminals in the ever-dyslexicle bass-ackward
down-under (he said dashedly) pronounce it.

Without the predominant meter L4 would be iambi trimeter. This can be problematic.

Yes, I think the decision wouldn't be whether to keep the "that's" or
drop it, but whether to keep the "that's" or substitute a word for it whose
varied dialectical (pun intended) pronunciations are consistently short.