The Beehive

[Carousal]

The Beehive

Interval
A release of conversation
Above me
Dvorak lingers in the blue mushrooms
~
Theatre smell
Music dust in crushed burgundy
Climbing the stairways
To the halftime bars
~
I sip overpriced whiskey
Amid a peck of cheek kisses
Murmur of nothing talk
and the fog of stale Chanel
~
She stands by the window drapes
Isolated by beauty
I engage her
With the price of a smile
~
Elgar easy on the lifting strings
As the Nimrod casts it spell
Oblivious
To two empty seats

Note: The Royal Albert Hall is nicknamed ‘The Beehive’ and the blue mushrooms are sound disks usually back lighted in blue and mounted on the high ceiling.

[ChristopherSea]

Hello Carousal,

This is a fine concrete poem. The image is immediately connected to the title, but the note does help with some of the passages. Many of these lines are gorgeous. However, that 'smell' of 'Music dust in crushed burgundy' was too abstract for my nose. I assume that 'Nimrod' is a composition by Elgar, but you also have Dvorak above, which is confusing (it's probably me). I see this as a collage of a night at this grand old hall with an unparalleled history.

Thanks for sharing your poem and welcome to the site./Chris

[ellajam]

I especially like

I sip overpriced whiskey
Amid a peck of cheek kisses
Murmur of nothing talk
and the fog of stale Chanel

Intermission in a nutshell.

I did note that "and" was the only line start not capitalized. I'm wondering if that was that an omission or intentional. Maybe you don't need the "and " at all. Do you think it helps the poem to have the pauses that the capitalization brings? I'm curious.

Thanks for the interesting read.

The Beehive

Interval
A release of conversation
Above me
Dvorak lingers in the blue mushrooms
~
Theatre smell
Music dust in crushed burgundy
Climbing the stairways
To the halftime bars
~
I sip overpriced whiskey
Amid a peck of cheek kisses
Murmur of nothing talk
and the fog of stale Chanel
~
She stands by the window drapes
Isolated by beauty
I engage her
With the price of a smile
~
Elgar easy on the lifting strings
As the Nimrod casts it spell
Oblivious
To two empty seats

Note: The Royal Albert Hall is nicknamed ‘The Beehive’ and the blue mushrooms are sound disks usually back lighted in blue and mounted on the high ceiling.

[Carousal]

Hi, thanks for reading, just to clear a couple of points. ‘Crushed Burgundy’ refers to the stair carpet to the theatre bars; the ‘Music Dust’ is just an abstract reference.
In Classical music concerts in England its not unusual to have two composer pieces divided by the interval. The link between Dvorak and Elgar is a bit odd I admit but Dvorak’s New World symphony and Elgar’s Enigma Variations were written within the same few years of each other and that’s the connection.

Thanks again for your comments.

Regards..

[ChristopherSea]

Hi, thanks for reading, just to clear a couple of points. ‘Crushed Burgundy’ refers to the stair carpet to the theatre bars; the ‘Music Dust’ is just an abstract reference.
In Classical music concerts in England its not unusual to have two composer pieces divided by the interval. The link between Dvorak and Elgar is a bit odd I admit but Dvorak’s New World symphony and Elgar’s Enigma Variations were written within the same few years of each other and that’s the connection.

Thanks again for your comments.

Regards..

Thanks for the explanation. I was was wondering if 'intermission' would serve you better, as 'interlude' would introduce yet another musical number in most theaters. Just a thought.

Never mind, you have interval!

[Carousal]

Good thinking I prefer it too. Thanks.

[John Galt]

The Beehive

Interval
A release of conversation
Above me
Dvorak lingers in the blue mushrooms
~
Theatre smell
Music dust in crushed burgundy
Climbing the stairways
To the halftime bars
~
I sip overpriced whiskey
Amid a peck of cheek kisses
Murmur of nothing talk
and the fog of stale Chanel
~
She stands by the window drapes
Isolated by beauty
I engage her
With the price of a smile
~
Elgar easy on the lifting strings
As the Nimrod casts it spell
Oblivious
To two empty seats

Note: The Royal Albert Hall is nicknamed ‘The Beehive’ and the blue mushrooms are sound disks usually back lighted in blue and mounted on the high ceiling.

Hello Carousel, I cannot make up my mind whether the abstract nature of line 4, verse 1, is worth it, yes, there is the explanation in the footnote, but the line did drop me out of the poem to consider its meaning. I like the other connotation of "above me" IE, that people were seated in the balcony.

I thought the "crushed burgundy" were drapes, which are to my mind more likely to hold "dust", even though "music dust" was an abstraction. I would drop the word "music".

I think you could cut both of the words the in verse 2 lines 3 and 4 without losing clarity.

Amid a peck of cheek kisses
Murmur of nothing talk
and the fog of stale Chanel

All the above seem worn out, new thoughts are a must.

Isolated by beauty, is borderline cliche for this reader, especially in the context it is used.

I like the last verse and the connotations it throws up, especially that both people were there alone, and the future it may bring.

Thank you. JG