< cat fine, woman dead >

[rayheinrich]

< cat fine, woman dead >

today a woman fell they said
down 14th floors and she was dead
a cat stuck on a ledge is why
she was the type who had to try
she slipped, she fell, she hit, she died
she was the only one who tried
foolish? "yes" my grandma said
"you slip, you fall, you end up dead"
"but just as sure as she fell down"
"she's up with God, stars in her crown"

- - -

I'm not sure this is fun, but since there's no
specific thread for doggerel, I'm placing it here.

[Brownlie]

< cat fine, woman dead >

today a woman fell they said
down 14th floors and she was dead
a cat stuck on a ledge is why
she was the type who had to try
she slipped, she fell, she hit, she died
she was the only one who tried
foolish? "yes" my grandma said
"you slip, you fall, you end up dead"
"but just as sure as she fell down"
"she's up with God, stars in her crown"

- - -

I'm not sure this is fun, but since there's no
specific thread for doggerel, I'm placing it here.

Here is my profound rabble

According to superstition cats have nine lives and our immortal souls will never die. Obituaries appear in newspaper headlines. Our clumsy good deeds are not balanced by tails, but told as terse and matter of fact as death. The star is light arriving late and pagans dance and pray to the sun. Why do cats have nine lives? What did they trade with the cosmos? Which ones of us are cats?

[rayheinrich]

Why do cats have nine lives?
What did they trade with the cosmos?
Which ones of us are cats?

Why cats have nine lives:
A few millennia ago a very hungry cat entered a house. As it happened,
eight children lived there. The cat ate them all. The next day the cat
died from having eaten too much and the spirits of the eight children
were trapped in its belly. To this day all cats hold the spirits of
the eight children in their bellies which is why they can die nine
different times before they become truly dead.
.
.
What did they trade with the cosmos?
Trick question.
Cats are known for always being unwilling to ever trade anything.
.
.
Ways to tell if someone is a cat:

1. Hold something small under their nose and ask them what it is.
Cats can't see under their nose and even if they could they wouldn't
tell you because cats won't do anything you tell them to.

2. Check for eyelashes: Cats don't have them.

3. Check feet: Cats have only four toes.

4. Check urine: Cat urine glows under a black light.

5. Drop them from a great height. A cat will land feet down.