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Edge of a boot flips
flat garden rock,
look down on
motorway construction,
JCB woodlice
ripple catapillar tracks,
earth worms cut new roads
oily black beetles,
tipping tarmac
Ants, digging drains,
four, just looking at a hole,
wearing egg white,
hi vis vests.
If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
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Are you just writing a poem about a scene? Because the imagery here is ever-present.
I'll be there in a minute.
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(02-20-2013, 08:51 AM)newsclippings Wrote: Are you just writing a poem about a scene? Because the imagery here is ever-present.
No these little creatures have full time jobs and its constant earth works.
If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
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Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I like it, but today I've decided my ability to respond effectively has disappeared. So consider me stupid.
I'll be there in a minute.
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just looking at a hole,
wearing egg white,
hi vis vests.
My favourite lines, there is poetry in everything if we take the time to look,
enjoyed
never make someone your priority when to them you are only an option
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(02-21-2013, 07:37 AM)Smiffy Wrote: just looking at a hole,
wearing egg white,
hi vis vests.
My favourite lines, there is poetry in everything if we take the time to look,
enjoyed
Thanks Smiffy, tis true having the time to look would be a good start.
If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
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this is great. simple little idea and well executed...
...oh, just read this again and it caught me by surprise just how much I really really enjoy this poem... thanks for the read.
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Love the simplicity of this.
Looking at the small /UN noticed things in life is a bit of a thing for me so this really worked for me in terms of subject.
I know this is not Ness for crit but I kind of want to flip the first stanza on its head.
and read from top to bottom. Prob a daft suggestion
As ever you offer something original and fun to read thanks. AJ
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(02-28-2013, 03:01 AM)cidermaid Wrote: Love the simplicity of this.
Looking at the small /UN noticed things in life is a bit of a thing for me so this really worked for me in terms of subject.
I know this is not Ness for crit but I kind of want to flip the first stanza on its head.
and read from top to bottom. Prob a daft suggestion
As ever you offer something original and fun to read thanks. AJ
Ooo I like the idea, I will have a go at that thanks and thank you for nice words. K
(02-27-2013, 01:24 PM)shemthepenman Wrote: this is great. simple little idea and well executed...
...oh, just read this again and it caught me by surprise just how much I really really enjoy this poem... thanks for the read.
Thanks for your comment much appreciated. K
If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
