Litmus

[71degrees]

You do love me
I have proof
sometimes you do
not love me:
pen and paper
accusations
much white space.

[71degrees]

You do love me
but I have proof
that sometimes
you do not:
love me
pen and paper
accusations  -------------ellipses or dash
much white space.

L3--the line break at do is awkward, and my editing altered it.
Your poem, for all its brevity, has an appeal that many can relate to. It can easily be morphed into a senryu, should you desire.

Thanks, AHL…appreciate the look. Like the dash suggestion. Thanks for that. Trying to stay away from prose in the front half.

[71degrees]

L3--the line break at do is awkward, and my editing altered it.
Your poem, for all its brevity, has an appeal that many can relate to. It can easily be morphed into a senryu, should you desire.

Thanks, AHL…appreciate the look. Like the dash suggestion. Thanks for that. Trying to stay away from prose in the front half.

Reading it again, I sense the line break at do was intentional, to make not goose the reader. Well done on that.

Oh, it was intentional. Thanks for recognizing that. Not perfect and still open to suggestions, for sure.

[bena]

absolutely love this. Bugger you...not many people write about not being able to write and do such a great job.

[71degrees]

absolutely love this.  Bugger you...not many people write about not being able to write and do such a great job.

Been called worse than a bugger Thank you.