Poetry Forum

It's a little strange
how on December 31
everyone thinks of change.

Well, a 'New Year's Resolution'
is NOT the right solution.

We set them at the beginning of the year
hoping it will gear
us up for a difference.
But at the end of the year,
we steer with no reference.

Change is impossible to avoid.

So, why use your resolution as a defective steroid?

There has to be something better to do.
How many people do you know that grew?

Hah!
Fantastic idea

I loved:
"Change is impossible to avoid.

So, why use your resolution as a defective steroid?"

the linebreak in:
"hoping it will gear
us up for a difference."
is unnecessary, you dont NEED that line to end in rhyme and it threw off my reading quite a lot ("us up for a difference" isn't even half a proper sentence).

I would personally suggest changing that to "hoping it will gear us up towards a difference"

a part from that I liked it.

(12-06-2012, 05:46 PM)benthejack Wrote: [ -> ]Hah!
Fantastic idea

I loved:
"Change is impossible to avoid.

So, why use your resolution as a defective steroid?"

the linebreak in:
"hoping it will gear
us up for a difference."
is unnecessary, you dont NEED that line to end in rhyme and it threw off my reading quite a lot ("us up for a difference" isn't even half a proper sentence).

I would personally suggest changing that to "hoping it will gear us up towards a difference"

a part from that I liked it.

Thanks for your feedback.
and
"hoping it will gear
us up for a difference."
was meant to be one sentence. Maybe I should be them on the same line together then, huh? lol

I appreciate it!