In the Fridge
#1
In the Fridge (Senryu)


Milk sours?  Yes, Stacey–
for bachelor just as for bachelorette,
milk sours.



First since NAPM (mine, anyway)
feedback award Non-practicing atheist
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#2
Hey Duke,
I like this one, especially how you used repetition, but with different punctuation. Plus, the souring milk is a pretty strong image, but its repetition mirrors the duality of the relationship in the poem.

Good stuff,
Riichard
Time is the best editor.
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#3
stacey is a great name for people in pieces like this. it got a laugh from me.

(05-01-2019, 10:42 PM)dukealien Wrote:  In the Fridge (Senryu)


Milk sours?  Yes, Stacey–
for bachelor just as for bachelorette,
milk sours.



First since NAPM (mine, anyway)
Reply




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