< the bones of april >
#1




        İmage


                                                < the bones of april >
                                               
                                               
                                                glow white in the moon
                                               
                                                pulling the tides apart
                                               
                                                as i
                                               
                                                your legs
                                               
                                                cast on a beach
                                               
                                                the remnants of old invasions
                                               
                                                picked by crows
                                               
                                                craving this food
                                               
                                                as we all must
                                               
                                                and the water
                                               
                                                and the kiss
                                               
                                                and everything is soon forgotten
                                               
                                                (save the kiss)
                                               
                                                        - - -





Any and all creatively off-topic responses accepted.



Image: "4 o'clock tuna" - crayola soaked in kerosene
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#2
i do so like your writing, not so much the pic that accompanies this time but the words like open legs are welcoming indeed.
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#3
(07-17-2014, 03:32 PM)billy Wrote:  i do so like your writing, not so much the pic that accompanies this time but the words like open legs are welcoming indeed.
am working furiously to improve pic, bear with me.
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#4
i can only remove my trousers if you pay me Blush
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#5
(07-17-2014, 02:25 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:  



        İmage


                                                < the bones of april >
                                               
                                               
                                                glow white in the moon
                                               
                                                pulling the tides apart
                                               
                                                as i
                                               
                                                your legs
                                               
                                                cast on a beach
                                               
                                                the remnants of old invasions
                                               
                                                picked by crows
                                               
                                                craving this food
                                               
                                                as we all must
                                               
                                                and the water
                                               
                                                and the kiss
                                               
                                                and everything is soon forgotten
                                               
                                                (save the kiss)
                                               
                                                        - - -




Any and all creatively off-topic responses accepted.

Image: "4 o'clock tuna" - crayola soaked in kerosene

I have read this a few times now and keep twisting round new thoughts and layers of understanding / interpretations. You always seem to make that happen and it is difficult to achieve, I have nothing to offer by way of crit only my respect and the thought that I wish I had wrote this. Best Keith

If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
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#6
Ray your previous poem (It's all about you) nearly induced me to log on to comment, becauseI thought it was so good and if I had still been modding would have put it up for the hog spot - very deserving. But you know...I think I like this one even more because i find it a deeper read.
(I even like the picture which I think has an echo of the layers of images that i get from your poem).

My only comment is I personally like punctuation, but I appreciate the skill that allows you to write without.
Thanks for posting this.
AJ

(07-17-2014, 02:25 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:  



                        İmage


                                                < the bones of april >
                                               
                                               
                                                glow white in the moon
                                               
                                                pulling the tides apart
                                               
                                                as i
                                               
                                                your legs
                                               
                                                cast on a beach
                                               
                                                the remnants of old invasions
                                               
                                                picked by crows
                                               
                                                craving this food
                                               
                                                as we all must
                                               
                                                and the water
                                               
                                                and the kiss
                                               
                                                and everything is soon forgotten
                                               
                                                (save the kiss)
                                               
                                                        - - -





Any and all creatively off-topic responses accepted.


Image: "april moons again" - crayola soaked in kerosene
[/size]

Hey the picture has changed whilst I was writing my message...don't like this picture (boring)
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#7
(07-17-2014, 03:38 PM)billy Wrote:  i can only remove my trousers if you pay me Blush

how much? (do you accept Croatian kunas?)
(have replaced not-so-good pic with maybe-it's-better-but-won't-know-until-you-tells-me-pic)


(07-17-2014, 04:00 PM)cidermaid Wrote:  Hey the picture has changed whilst I was writing my message...don't like this picture (boring)

Must decide between You and Billy...
No brainer! Billy wants $$$ to take his pants off and you don't.


Wait for it..... just one more moment...... there!

My former chef-d'œuvr has reintroduced itself!


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#8
(07-17-2014, 04:05 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:  
(07-17-2014, 03:38 PM)billy Wrote:  i can only remove my trousers if you pay me Blush

how much? (do you accept Croatian kunas?)
(have replaced not-so-good pic with maybe-it's-better-but-won't-know-until-you-tells-me-pic)
no kunas, bacon sandwiches will work though. i was probably being pedantic and this looks like the original. in retrospect it does have an affinity with the poem. as it looks like a shore line and sea. (tide)
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#9
(hmm, image on ipad, only image icon thingie on windows/chrome, I have no idea.)

I like how the image confuses me as if it's a reflection but not.

I love how the lines remain separate yet interconnect differently with the one above and below, a good match with the image for me.

And what seals it for me is that bit of honey on my tongue at the end. I'm not done here, thanks.

(and AJ, so nice to have you around.)
billy wrote:welcome to the site. make it your own, wear it like a well loved slipper and wear it out.
ella pleads:please click forum titles for posting guidelines, important threads.
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#10
Yes, the image has a literal (subconsciously intentional) fit to it. It started as a row of hills (turn it counterclockwise to see
them) in the background of a foreground that was never added. I was looking for some abstracted 'bones' and, it being white,
I picked it out. It seemed a bit stubby for bones, so I stretched it out to make 'them' longer and rotated it clockwise to fit
the panorama-friendly dimensions of the web page (well, ok, if you think "scroll" then a webpage is a most wonderful vertical
thingee and poems with really short lines work just great when run beside or within ray went on and on babbling...).
The 'beach' was serendipitous; but, now that it's been pointed out to me, I'm hereby swearing it was intentional.
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#11
You can use a picture of bilbo's vagina.
Balls balls balls balls balls
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#12
(07-18-2014, 07:22 AM)newsclippings Wrote:  You can use a picture of bilbo's vagina.

(07-18-2014, 07:22 AM)newsclippings Wrote:  You can use a picture of bilbo's vagina.

It was hard to find a picture of it as it was blurred out or concealed
(for obvious reasons) in most every one I looked at. But after much
sleuthing, which involved the viewing of an untold number of other
celebrity vaginas (Paris Hilton's was as squalid a patch of goo as I'd
ever laid eyes on):

EUREKA! I had found Bilbo's vagina*.

Someone (either by mistake or in a fit of prurient fervor) had left
it intact. Since it's a bit hard to pick out in the webish picture,
I've included an enlarged view of the pertinent area as well.

İmage



*For all you anatomy Nazis out there (yet another form of grammar Nazi):

Yeah, sure, yada yada yada, what we're actually looking at are
Frodo's labia majora perched on either side of his pudendal cleft.
Upon entering said cleft (not unlike passing through the Doors of Durin)
his vagina (whose Tolkian metaphor is the great Dwarven city of Khazad-dûm)
beckons.

(And who amongst us; be we sinner or saint, genderly identified or
amorously indistinct, grammerrily correct or abstractedly poetific could
[shadows of doubt not excepted] resist?)

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#13
İmage
Balls balls balls balls balls
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#14
(07-18-2014, 11:14 AM)newsclippings Wrote:  İmage

And if (not that we need dream of this) and if...

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#15
putin's a vagina Blush
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#16
(07-18-2014, 04:55 PM)billy Wrote:  putin's a vagina Blush
Was that a question? Answers in the vernacular, please.
More of a Lloyd Bridges...what was he in again? Ah yes. C-unt
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#17
(07-19-2014, 08:26 AM)tectak Wrote:  
(07-18-2014, 04:55 PM)billy Wrote:  putin's a vagina Blush
Was that a question? Answers in the vernacular, please.
More of a Lloyd Bridges...what was he in again? Ah yes. C-unt

To equate Putin with the Holy of Holies, that inner
sanctum of the Tabernacle of our birth and transcendence,
our Ark of the Covenant which can only be entered by the prurient
of heart (and occasionally by a finger or two) is a sacrilege of the
highest order! Go hence to your fanny, o ye of little phallus;
the fate of blasphemers is more than a bit unpleasant, it's like
being reincarnated as a maggot, or worse, a Putin. Yes, a Putin,
that's the ticket.

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#18
Somebody was reading this...
Thank you, ray, for leaving something so beautiful for the rest of us
Don’t like the last line, though

Should I have bumped it?
Maybe, for the current generation
~ I think I just quoted myself - Achebe
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