Highway 12, 5:36 pm

[71degrees]

Honeyed light,
pooling in warm
pastures

tiny figures,
dabs of luminous
colors:

straw hat, a young man’s red jacket,
flocks of Canada geese

a stir of starlings,
busy with evening
arrangements

sun set
in favored time

[TranquillityBase]

Honeyed light,
pooling in warm
pastures

tiny figures,                       since the hat, the coat, are not exactly figures, I'd cut this line
dabs of luminous
colors:

straw hat, a young’s man’s red jacket,
flocks of Canada geese

a stir of starlings,
busy with evening
arrangements              my favorite bit

sun set
in favored time             this seems a weak ending; I'd almost rather see the title here as the last line

[Mark A Becker]

Hello degrees,
I'd suggest swapping the last line and the title, and also adding more dabs of luminous color. All in all, there's interesting, stark imagery. I also have a soft spot for short poems like this. 
I couldn't help but add 'dwells' to slant rhyme with '12' 
Thanks, Mark

In Favored Time

Honeyed light,
pooling in warm
pastures

tiny figures,  Hmm?? Doesn't do anything for me
dabs of luminous
colors:

straw hat, a young man’s red jacket,  no 's on young
flocks of Canada geese  color?

a stir of starlings, color?
busy with evening
arrangements

sunset dwells
on Highway 12

[71degrees]

Honeyed light,
pooling in warm
pastures

tiny figures,                       since the hat, the coat, are not exactly figures, I'd cut this line
dabs of luminous
colors:

straw hat, a young’s man’s red jacket,
flocks of Canada geese

a stir of starlings,
busy with evening
arrangements              my favorite bit

sun set
in favored time             this seems a weak ending; I'd almost rather see the title here as the last line

Thanks for your time here and suggestions.

starlings are always black

---

Hello degrees,
I'd suggest swapping the last line and the title, and also adding more dabs of luminous color. All in all, there's interesting, stark imagery. I also have a soft spot for short poems like this. 
I couldn't help but add 'dwells' to slant rhyme with '12' 
Thanks, Mark

In Favored Time

Honeyed light,
pooling in warm
pastures

tiny figures,  Hmm?? Doesn't do anything for me
dabs of luminous
colors:

straw hat, a young man’s red jacket,  no 's on young
flocks of Canada geese  color?

a stir of starlings, color?
busy with evening
arrangements

sunset dwells
on Highway 12

Thanks for your read and suggestions here. Appreciated.

Starlings always black.

---

Sorry for mixing up the comments a bit from one poster to the other. Can't seem to navigate these threads when trying to edit them. Do appreciate all the comments.

Nice catch on 'young's'....have edited this.