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[Image: ebola_toad_made_you_look.jpg]









[Image: ebola_toad_click_here.jpg]









[Image: ebola_toad_sucker.jpg]




confession: I tried to click.  *face-palm* several times.  Confused  

Hysterical well done.
(09-15-2016, 09:27 AM)Quixilated Wrote: [ -> ]

confession: I tried to click.  *face-palm* several times.  Confused  

Hysterical well done




    She's an "ebola toad" and specializes in abuse (though usually of me; but I ask her, from time to time, to spread it around).




These are cane toads a.k.a. "friends of Leanne":
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1. Once the warm water has entered the radiator, switch off your central heating system.

2. You will then need to locate your ‘bleed key’, which is supplied with all radiators.  This is a tool which opens and closes the valve of your radiator. If you can’t find your bleed key, you can buy one in most large DIY stores or, as a last resort, you may be able to use a screw driver or pliers.

3. Insert the bleed key into the valve, which is usually located at the top of one end of the radiator.

4. Turn the valve key so that it opens the valve slightly. Only turn it enough to allow the air to escape slowly – if water begins to flow out, you’ve turned it too much. It’s a good idea to have a towel handy in case this happens. Protect your hands with a cloth, as air and water escaping could be very hot.

5. There should be a hissing sound as the air escapes. When the first drops of water have come out, you’ll know that all the air has escaped and it’s time to tighten the valve again.

6. You can now turn your central heating system back on to check that the radiator is functioning as normal and that there are no leaks. You may also need to adjust the water pressure by filling it up from the cold water mains as it could be affected by bleeding the radiator.
you're all animals


Warning: Adult Content


Before You Begin:

Setting the Mood – If you’ve ever closed the blinds, turned down the lights
and lit a few candles before sex, you know how much a change in ambiance
can help your mood. The same applies when you’re flying solo.

You might feel more comfortable letting go if you lay down a towel before
you get started. Pick up your favorite erotica story to kick things off. Just
make sure not to get any lube on the pages.

Learn more on how to squirt from this detailed guide:

[Image: armadillo.jpg]
I cover many different techniques in detail on how to get yourself in the mood in this section:

[Image: holdingbrain.jpg]
You may also be interested in checking out this article on how to make yourself horny:

[Image: birdsnake.jpg]

(09-15-2016, 04:19 PM)rayheinrich Wrote: [ -> ]


Warning: Adult Content


Before You Begin:

Setting the Mood – If you’ve ever closed the blinds, turned down the lights
and lit a few candles before sex, you know how much a change in ambiance
can help your mood. The same applies when you’re flying solo.

Correctly hitting your G Spot can lead to female ejaculation so you might feel
more comfortable letting go if you lay down a towel before you get started.
Pick up your favorite erotica story to kick things off. Just make sure not to
get any lube on the pages.

Learn more on how to squirt from this detailed guide:

[Image: armadillo.jpg]
I cover many different techniques in detail on how to get yourself in the mood in this section of the Vibrator Guide:

[Image: holdingbrain.jpg]
You may also be interested in checking out this article on how to make yourself horny:

[Image: birdsnake.jpg]


Careful Ray, those less knowledgeable about lady business might become confused. Smile
(09-15-2016, 04:26 PM)lizziep Wrote: [ -> ]Careful Ray, those less knowledgeable about lady business might become confused. Smile

Yes, you're right, I just revised it to make it gender-neutral.
Though, come to think of it, that's probably confusing as well.
But then, if there was no confusion, none of us would need to write poetry.



[Image: ac_no.jpg]



Step 1 - Prepare the Vehicle
Find a flat, dry place to work, and then remove the negative battery cable from the terminal post on the battery.

Step 2 - Remove the Gear Shifter Handle or Knob
Twist the gear shifter handle or knob counter clockwise until it comes off.

Step 3 - Remove Trim Plate or Console
Some vehicles come equipped with a shifter trim plate or console. If your car has either one, you'll need to remove it before you can proceed.

Step 4 - Jack Up the Vehicle
Using the floor jack, jack up your vehicle and place it securely on jack stands.

Step 5 - Remove Cables and Wiring
You'll need to remove the speedometer cable as well as any electrical wire harnesses or other wires that may be attached to car's gearbox. When removing these items, always label them with masking tape and a ballpoint pen, so that you'll know what they are when you re-install the transmission.

Step 6 - Remove Transfer Case
If your vehicle has four-wheel-drive, you will need to remove the transfer case by loosening the bolts that attach it to the transmission.

Step 7 - Remove Shifter or Shift Levers
If your vehicle comes equipped with shifters or shift levers that are attached to the transmission, remove the nuts and bolts that hold them in place, and the shifter or lever and put it in a safe place.

Step 8 - Remove Transmission Mount
Remove the bolts that hold the main transmission mount in place, and then remove the mount and set it aside.

Step 9 - Remove the Crossmember
There will usually be four bolts that hold the crossmember securely to the frame. Remove them and then remove the crossmember.

Step 10 - Place Jack Under Transmission
Before you can actually remove the transmission in your vehicle, you'll need to place the transmission jack directly under the transmission. A regular floor jack will not usually support the weight of your car's transmission, so don't attempt to use it for that purpose.

Step 11 - Remove the Gearbox
Only when the transmission jack is in place, can you begin removing the gearbox itself. Locate the bolts that hold the transmission in place and then use a breaker bar to loosen them slightly. Then, adjust your transmission jack so that it is touching the bottom of the transmission, and then finish removing the bolts. Don't attempt to remove the bolts unless the transmission jack is placed in contact with the transmission as it may fall and cause damage to the transmission or injury to you.

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so confused right now  Confused  
I want one that says "old shit"

clearly gets the message across methinks.
(09-15-2016, 09:14 PM)Quixilated Wrote: [ -> ]

so confused right now  Confused  


that'll be your age

are you saying I am too old or too young?

this feels like high school ... and college ... all over again, with the cool kids talking in codes. Huh  
(09-15-2016, 09:58 PM)Quixilated Wrote: [ -> ]

are you saying I am too old or too young?

this feels like high school ... and college ... all over again, with the cool kids talking in codes. Huh  



UTIs are one of the common causes of confusion in the elderly; in fact, this is often the first thing doctors test for when treating an older patient that presents with confusion. Symptoms include:
    • Confusion, unusual behavior, or sudden change in mental status
    • Sudden inability to perform tasks they can typically perform with ease
    • Urine that appears cloudy, red, bright pink, or brownish in color
    • Strong, persistent urge to urinate and/or passing frequent, small amounts of urine
    • Pain while urinating
    • Urine having a strong odor
Urinary tract infections should be treated with antibiotics immediately to avoid complications.
Steps that can be taken to reduce risk of UTI include drinking plenty of water, maintaining good hygiene, taking showers instead of baths, and avoiding use of feminine products such as powders and sprays in the genital area.

i clip your ears with my non-secateurs
fuck orf, it's already getting out of hand Hysterical Hysterical

(09-15-2016, 09:21 PM)Pdeathstar Wrote: [ -> ]I want one that says "old shit"

clearly gets the message across methinks.
(09-15-2016, 10:32 PM)shemthepenman Wrote: [ -> ]
(09-15-2016, 09:58 PM)Quixilated Wrote: [ -> ]

are you saying I am too old or too young?

this feels like high school ... and college ... all over again, with the cool kids talking in codes. Huh  


UTIs are one of the common causes of confusion in the elderly; in fact, this is often the first thing doctors test for when treating an older patient that presents with confusion. Symptoms include:
    • Confusion, unusual behavior, or sudden change in mental status
    • Sudden inability to perform tasks they can typically perform with ease
    • Urine that appears cloudy, red, bright pink, or brownish in color
    • Strong, persistent urge to urinate and/or passing frequent, small amounts of urine
    • Pain while urinating
    • Urine having a strong odor
Urinary tract infections should be treated with antibiotics immediately to avoid complications.
Steps that can be taken to reduce risk of UTI include drinking plenty of water, maintaining good hygiene, taking showers instead of baths, and avoiding use of feminine products such as powders and sprays in the genital area.

i clip your ears with my non-secateurs


I'll have you know that I am not so old as you imply.  Dodgy

also, my lady parts are in perfect working order. Wink  

the confusion stems from other people being cryptic and ... all metaphorical.   Confused



sorry billy, these little boxes are just too fun.  Big Grin
(09-15-2016, 10:47 PM)Quixilated Wrote: [ -> ]

also, my lady parts are in perfect working order.


you had to go and lower the tone. you've let me down, you've let the high moral and ethical standards of the pigpen down, but more importantly, you've let yourself down. now go away and have a little think about what you've done.
(09-16-2016, 06:22 AM)shemthepenman Wrote: [ -> ]

you had to go and lower the tone. you've let me down, you've let the high moral and ethical standards of the pigpen down, but more importantly, you've let yourself down. now go away and think about what you've done.


Oh dear.  I feel terrible.  Confused  Have I offended your high moral sensibilities? Please accept my humble apologies.  And ... um ... don't look in the box.  

 Well aren't you naughty doing things you've been told not to do?  Who has the questionable morals now????? Dodgy

I put myself in the corner to think about what I have put everyone through.  And the more I think about it the more I just keep grinning.  Big Grin Sorry ... woke up impish today.  Maybe tomorrow I'll feel bad.
 

i didn't look in the box. probably about knitting or something. but i accept your apology. i know it's sometimes difficult for the elderly to admit when they're wrong, so well done. I SAID "WELL DONE".
(09-16-2016, 07:25 AM)shemthepenman Wrote: [ -> ]

i didn't look in the box. probably about knitting or something. but i accept your apology. i know it's sometimes difficult for the elderly to admit when they're wrong, so well done. I SAID "WELL DONE".

And well done you!  Pretending you didn't look in my box ... Too bad everyone is going to see right through that.  They all know you wouldn't have been able to resist ... Pandora's got nothin' on me. Big Grin

and I'm not old, you don't have to yell.  Dodgy
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